My Story: from perfection to grace
When I was a little girl, my parents would take my sister and I to church on Sundays. We would participate in Sunday school and learn about Jesus. One VBS (Vacation Bible School), the kids' ministers extended an invitation for us to come forward if we wanted to accept Jesus into our hearts. I decided to go up to the front with my friend and there we prayed our profession of faith. At that moment, I became a Christian - I believed in God and knew He loved me. However, I did not enter into a personal relationship with Him at that time. I was still unaware of how much I needed Him. Shortly after, I got baptized and that was such a great celebration!
Fast forward to middle and high school. My sister and I were very involved in club volleyball during this season of life. We would have a tournament almost every weekend, so we would miss church on Sundays. On the weekends that we were off, my family wanted to rest so we did not attend church regularly during this time.
During my sophomore year of high school, a friend invited me to attend youth group with her on Sunday. I attended with her and had a lot of fun. I signed up for the D-Now weekend (called Freedom) that our youth group was putting on. During Freedom, I had never experienced worship so fun and enthusiastic. I had never felt God’s presence like I had during worship at Freedom. A few weeks later, I attended the Wednesday night youth group worship service. There they had multiple people – students, leaders, adults, pastors – share their testimony and describe their story with a hashtag (ok…I know it’s cheesy but at the time this is when hashtags were huge). Of course at the end of the service, they asked the crowd of students, “What’s your hashtag?” In that moment I realized I had no idea what my hashtag would be…..because I did not have a personal relationship with Jesus.
That night at home, I opened up my bible for the first time in a long time. I read Matthew 6: 19-21 which says, “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieve do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
It hit me like a ton of bricks – I was living my life for myself. I was storing up treasures for myself. I was striving for perfection and to be liked by everyone. I was 100% inward focused. In that moment, the Lord softened my heart and opened my eyes to see that I need Him. I need Him to be the reason I live and the reason that I do everything that I do in this life. So that night, in my bedroom, I gave my life to Jesus.
I realized then that my hashtag would be #selfless. It was a challenge and a kick start to living my life for Christ and not for myself.
Since that night in my bedroom during the spring of my sophomore year of high school, the Lord has grown me and taught me so much. The neat thing about a testimony or about a story is that with Jesus our story doesn’t end when we accept Him as our Lord and Savior. God continues to grow me and challenge me and shape me into becoming more like His Son. I am not always #selfless but that is why I’m so thankful for God’s grace and His mercy that is new everyday.
I could write a ton more about how the Lord has grown me in prayer, in my knowledge of scripture, in community, in vulnerability, in service and sacrifice, and so much more. All of the glory goes to Him!! I am still learning and growing; I’m so thankful that He is continuing to write my story! For now, I wanted to share the beginning of my journey in giving up more of myself to let more of Jesus come in.
